Casa Bonita

Casa Bonita. If you didn’t hear about it on South Park, you’re about to now.

Friday was my friend Allyson’s birthday. It was discovered that almost none of my friends, Allyson included, had ever been to Casa Bonita. If you live in Colorado for 6 years without ever going, you are shot, or deported to Kansas. So we all went. We also went because Casa Bonita is awesome. I’ll explain.

So will the pics. Which is all you really care about. You picture whores.

Casa Bonita Pics!

So as one drives west of downtown Denver on Colfax, you see more and more signs written in Espanol, and you think, “I bet I could get some good authentic Mexican food around here.” And then you see a giant pink tower in adobe with lights, fountains, and electric burros, and you think “maybe not.”

Jenny and I (Casa Bonita veterans) led our fearful friends through the winding Six-Flags type line to order our delectable Mexican cuisine. The choices were mind-boggling, but the cleverly constructed maze of railings gave us plenty of time to choose the perfect Mexican combo before the ride, or experience, began. Mere minutes after ordering, our meals came magically rolling out of an adobe window as if they were conjured out of thin air! We then carried our steaming trays into a truly magical land.

There are 3 stories of glory. All eyes are drawn towards the central stony waterfall, which falls 50 ft to a shimmering palm laden pool. The top of the waterfall is bedecked by a small stage for vaudeville style entertainment. The entire grotto/waterfall is cleverly constructed with multiple perches and vines for the skilled cliff divers to dangerously plunge from into the watery depths. Amazing! Yet there is so much more to see.

When we entered the wonderland, I had to physically pull Jen away from the sweet sounds of the live Mariachi band because of the enticing aromas coming from my meal. As we dined, it was touching to see tears of nostalgia welling up in Jill’s eyes as she remembered the time her husband Chad proposed to her just two tables away from where we sat. And now their toddler son, Kieran was wide-eyed and captivated by the myriad of sights, sounds, and smells.

We ate quickly so we could show the youngster the stage show. A bold explorer had captured a savage native near the waterfall and was showing the prize off to a beautiful damsel. Dramatically the fiendish savage escaped! We held our breath as he ran right past our table! Fortunately, the brave explorer chased the savage off the third floor stage into the chilly pool below. Bravo!

With the addition of my roommates Andrew and Zola, we felt brave enough to explore Black Bart’s Cave. It was dark and treacherous, with booby-traps, dragons, and glowing crystals. Zola trembled with fear, but the bravery of young Kieran steadied our hearts and we pressed on. Our spirits lightened as we exited, for there at the end of the cave was a puppet show! And after the puppet show, a piñata breaking! Could it get any better?

Yes! For desert, we played ski-ball, and observed countless youngsters get their first taste of the world of gambling. How the tickets flowed! We played with inspiration, knowing we played not for ourselves but for the birthday girl, Allyson. And our efforts did not go unrewarded. The thousands of tickets we won were then exchanged for Allyson’s Casa Bonita Coasters and Pirate Eye-Patches for the ladies! Yarrrrggghhhhh!! Excellent booty! And then, the skill of the lovely ladies was then noticed, as they were all made proud members of the Casa Bonita Diving Team, and given T-shirts to show off there new team status.

The diving team then continued to the pubs, and then we all sledded down the stairs. The end.